Drama School Diaries (DSD) Part 14 (THERE WAS BEEF!!)

15 Apr

Hey Pookies!

Don’t watch the fact that I ain’t posted up one of these in a while. It’s all fine. I’m not breaking down…I’m still here!

So, as you know I go to Guildhall School of MUSIC and Drama…so there are two departments, and a corridor that divides the Musicians and the Drama Students. One of the teachers (Dina) decided to do this thing called LIFESWAP; where a Drama Student and a Music Student swap places! Great…..

….in theory…

So, one of my bezzy mates at school Sannah, tells me some girl called Beth is doing lifeswap. She’s a musician, apparently a little stuck up her own arse. Apparently Musician-Chick snogged Sannah’s housemates boyfriend and totally screwed her over…apparently my mate Sannah don’t like Musician-Chick Beth. And I’m thinking well, Musician-Chick Beth is coming into our class in a couple days so I KNOW this is gonna be interesting.

It’s Thursday Morning and I walk into class and Beth is there…Sannah is already getting put off balance by her presence but I’m thinking maybe Musician-Chick ain’t too bad. So I decide to find out for myself and initiate an introduction. So i go up to her, well nice, and introduce myself. Musician-Chick Beth gives the FAKEST SMILE known to mankind, she doesn’t even wait till I’m gone before she lets it drop.

I’m like WOAH.

WOAH….

This Music Chick must be some kinda WITCH and a half. (pure judgments i know lol)

The class starts, it’s ‘Theatre Background’; our most theoretical class (some consider the most boring at times). Diana’s giving a talk, you can tell it’s gonna be one’a’dem long ones but the whole point is, if you can’t pay attention you play the game and PRETEND you’re listening out of respect…

…but it appears Musician Chick Beth doesn’t wanna play ball. She looked like she was sucking on lemons the whole time! She was rolling her eyes and everything! Now…this might seem normal for a class lesson to you, but in my school YOU JUST DON’T DO THAT!…Sannah’s looking angry…her face is all jam coloured and I’m looking for a trace of ‘happy’ on her face but I cannot detect a hint of it. She whispers something to me along the lines of *F word this and F word that* and I say “ignore her Sannah, ignore her”

Then…

MUSICIAN-CHICK BETH gets out her MOBILE PHONE!!!! BARE WITH MY SHOCK HORROR BUT THIS DOES NOT EVER HAPPEN IN MY SCHOOL!!

She’s sending text messages! Oh my daaaaays! The whole class is now ACUTELY concious of this alien predator..Dani’s getting steamed up; her feet and hands are tapping like 10 times their usual rate, and she is LITERALLY is about to say something, she changes her mind…I look at Sannah…she’s now a weird blueberry colour; I look for a trace of ‘keeping the peace’ on her face and for the life of me I cannot find it anywhere! I write her a note;

‘DON’T RISE TO IT’

I correct my note and show it to her again

‘DON’T RISE TO IT FALL INTO IT’

She nods…I can see she’s taken on board what I wrote. Thank God for that.

What the FLIP; before I blinked a crazed flash of purple sparked her face and Sannah shouts;

‘ARE YOU HAVING AN Fing JOKE?’

The whole class is inwardly thinking ‘ohhhh my gosssssh thiis cannot be happening’ yet we are in complete silence.
MUSICIAN-CHICK BETH laughs at Sannah, looks at the teacher and says summink like

‘forget sitting here and listening to this BS’

rips up the worksheet and stands up…

I’m thinkin Sannah don’t get up…don’t get up…don’t get up…

Sannah gets up. Of course. and mantis-moves towards Musician-Chick, I, of course put on my super-hero costume, run up and hold Sannah back. I hold her purple head and say ‘DON’T FALL INTO IT’…she looked like beetroot…which was, for a millisecond humorous, but back to the task at hand! She nods, sits down.

Sannah sits down, chuckles, and says

‘well, i guess that’s an example of dadaism’

Confused face expressions unify the whole class and I’m thinking ‘Sannah this is not the time for your awkward jokes man, allow the defense mechanisms’

She says it again;

‘well, i guess that’s an example of dadaism’

I’m looking at her thinking ‘what in the world?! has she lost her mind?!’

Sannah picks up a sheet…she reads… ‘…

Dadaism is a cultural movement that began in Zürich, Switzerland, during World War I and peaked from 1916 to 1922…Dada activities included public gatherings, demonstrations…an opportunity for the true perception and criticism of the times we live in…’

Musician Chick Beth comes in…she’s smiling, Sannah smiles…

IT WAS A SET UP.

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2 Responses to “Drama School Diaries (DSD) Part 14 (THERE WAS BEEF!!)”

  1. Precious One April 22, 2010 at 8:50 am #

    haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahaaa!!!! Priceless!

  2. :-) April 20, 2010 at 3:04 am #

    LOL!

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